Wednesday, July 30, 2008
Goodbye To Innocence
It's the eve of my birthday & the number 30 is about to make love to my face. It's a kiss I have not been yearning for. I spent the earlier part of the day writing this fabulous blog. Unfortunately, Safari decided to shut down & all my wonderful words were erased. At least it can't take away my memories dammit. My work day is almost over & I plan on taking off tomorrow & Friday as well. Nickakah is in full swing & believe me I will be discussing it really soon. I would also still like to take a blog to wax poetic on the decade that has seen me go through hairstyles, colors, women, men, jobs, cities, states, you name it. It was a time for learning things about myself & coming into my own. I remember years ago I was always attracted to older guys. Men in their 30's just seemed to have it more together. Ofcourse that wasn't always the truth but it was something I was attracted to. How funny it is now when I get hit on by young boys. I was reminded of me from so long ago. So here's to hoping that I exhibit the qualities that I used to be so attracted to. Because if this is where I am in life at my thirties in seems a nice place to start. So at around 4 something in the morning it will be official. Is it any shock that I came into this world in the middle of the night? Of course not, the night time is when I'm at my most festive. Goodbye to an innocence that I will remember fondly & hello to everything that awaits me.
Thursday, July 3, 2008
Too Much Pride
It's Thursday & I'm finally back at work properly after only working half a day on Tuesday. Why you ask? Well, at 4 something Monday morning I woke up covered in sweat & my sheets soaked. I had a fever & my throat was sore. A few hours later I called into work sick & went to the store to get tylenol & all that other stuff that's suppose to make you better. By Tuesday I went back to work but by this point my throat was massively swollen & it hurt to swallow. Everyone at work said we figured you were just calling out of work because it was Pride weekend. I wish that had been the case. I went to the dr on my lunch break & found out I had acute tonsillitis. He also said I could be contagious so I needed to be alone for at least 24 hrs once the anti-biotics kicked in. I was like wow, if this is what it's like acute then I'd hate to see what it's like if it was called unattractive tonsillitis. Solitary confinement is not fun. I mean we all know how much I love my me, myself & I time but being forced to is not fun. Yesterday I decided I would go to the movies & do my classic double feature. Pay for one movie & then sneak into another when it is done. I watched Hancock & Wall E, both I would highly recommend. I would have snuck into another but alas, my ass was tired of sitting.
But I digress, let's chat about what I think brought about this whole acute tonsillitis. Last week was Pride week here in NYC & my friends & I had tons of it. This is Vadim's holiday & he had been figuring out what he was going to wear since the day after Pride a year ago. Don't laugh, it's his thing. This was also Scott's first Pride so we had to make sure to do it up right for him. We officially kicked it off on Thursday by going to an Out magazine party where our friend Joe was deejaying. There wasn't dancing really but when he put on my second favorite dance song of all time 'You Used To Hold Me' I couldn't help myself, I had to shake my ass a little. All the while, double fisting. That's right. My tolerance has come back. It's not it's full capacity but it definitely is better then it was. After the Out party we headed over to the Ritz to meet up with the rest of our crew. Tons of dancing & posing ensued & I rocked the stairs with Jackee Star Jones. Who is that you may ask? Well it's a name Vadim & I have given a drag queen there. She always works the stairs & wears a black bob wig & black glasses. Before, it had been a long, curly, luxurious do. But I'm assuming that is just TOO much hair now that it's summer in the city. We get the name from Jackee who used to be on 227. We've found tons of ways to bring those characters to our life. In my building, on the first floor there is a sweet older latina lady & she just sits at the window watching everyone's business. We call her Pearl. 227 was fabulous. There ain't no place like home. I mean no place child.
So, back to Pride. After a tiring day at work, I went home to take a small disco nap. I had to prep myself for Friday night's Madonnathon at Pyramid. I had also convinced my straight roommate to come out with us. He's been bringing up the fact that he wishes he could have the gay lifestyle & has been a little jealous of my antics recently. I seem to go through phases. Either I'm incredibly virginal or I'm a raving sex-omatic. I've been calling it my Virgin/Whore Complex Tour. So for me to do my best at getting a straight man laid was going to be hard. There are tons of girls who show up to Pyramid on Friday nights so I figured he had a pretty good chance. I was doing my best until I got sidetracked by a hot piece of man on the go go box. Then it was each man for his own. I jumped on the box, ditched the shirt & started making out with him. This continued for a while until he said he had to leave. Either way, it wasn't gonna break my stride. I continued dancing & then somehow magically found myself in the arms of someone I knew for quite some time. All of us had given him the nickname Whore of Charm School. Now I was in his web. What can I say? I kissed a boy & I liked it. The taste of his cherry chap stick. It felt so wrong, it felt so right. It definitely didn't mean I was in love that night. In the midst of all that he then told me had a boyfriend & felt all kinds of bad about what he was doing so he abruptly left. Once again, my stride wasn't broken. We stayed & danced for quite a while. My straight roommate had long given up on the 2 girls he was trying to woo & by this time he had decided to leave. We ended our night with apparently one more guy asking if I would make out with him & being that I was apparently giving it out so freely I did. Then, Vadim & I left & went walking the streets of the East Village. It was there we came across this rather cute guy who stopped & talked with us. We went back to his apartment & the conversation would go kind of like this. Guy to me: Ummm you're really cute. I'd smile. Vadim would all of a sudden say Thank You! Laughter would ensue & then he'd say you have really nice skin tone. I'd smile. Vadim would again say Thank You! The night ended with Vadim leaving & me staying. You can use your imagine but I will say I didn't fully seal the deal on it.
By the next morning I felt hungover & hot. This guy had no AC & I was in need of getting the fuck out. So on my walk of shame I went. The day consisted of me doing laundry & other odds & ends & I met up with Sean so he could put some highlights in my hair. Later that night we all went to Splash & I ended up keeping my Maneater ways under control. A guy that I had had my first real date with in almost 3 yrs had meant to show up but ended up not getting in because the club was filled to capacity so they weren't letting any one else in. So we all danced the night away & then went home. Sunday was the day of the parade & I met up with everyone at different locations. I went up to Jason's work office to go to the bathroom & hang out when all of a sudden the clouds came over & a flood of rain came over the parade. It didn't seem to phase many people as they just took off their shirts & dance & run around in the parade. Scott looked like a kid in a candy store to me. It was his first parade & visions of sugar plum bottoms were all dancing in his head. I was reminded of my first pride in 2000 when I was 21 & I ended up going to to Jersey with a couple. Sigh. Oh how innocent I was then. Now it's 8 years later & I'm almost taking over the role of the Whore of Charm School. But maybe I'm being too hard on myself. Maybe it's just that virgin/whore complex I've been having. Maybe it's the fact that I have friggin tonsillitis & I'm just sure I got it from my antics of Friday night. Anyway, whatever it is it is. All in all Pride was a wonderful time. We finished the day off by going to Dallas BBQ & then hanging out some more at Jason's. The night ended with some drama that I won't get into but I did find myself back at Jordan's apartment. Unfortunately, he had received some bad news about his grandmother. A couple days ago, she passed away. I couldn't help but think about how when mine had passed & how I took the news alone. I figured no one else should have to do the same. What I found interesting was the fact that he called me. As it turns out, some times we still use each other as the go to if something go wrong. I guess when you're used to something for so long it's easy to revisit & count on it. I was just glad to be able to be there. I do know that when I got sick at the beginning of the week I did remember how easier it was when I wasn't single & I could lay in bed & someone else would make chicken soup or whatever. But that's how it is, you get the pro's & con's with everything.
As for this weekend I think I'll keep it a calm one. I'm perfectly ok with it. Yesterday my sister turned 20 & I'm once again reminded that my bday is just right around the corner. The big 3-0. Sigh. It is what it is. I'll still keep on being fabulous.
But I digress, let's chat about what I think brought about this whole acute tonsillitis. Last week was Pride week here in NYC & my friends & I had tons of it. This is Vadim's holiday & he had been figuring out what he was going to wear since the day after Pride a year ago. Don't laugh, it's his thing. This was also Scott's first Pride so we had to make sure to do it up right for him. We officially kicked it off on Thursday by going to an Out magazine party where our friend Joe was deejaying. There wasn't dancing really but when he put on my second favorite dance song of all time 'You Used To Hold Me' I couldn't help myself, I had to shake my ass a little. All the while, double fisting. That's right. My tolerance has come back. It's not it's full capacity but it definitely is better then it was. After the Out party we headed over to the Ritz to meet up with the rest of our crew. Tons of dancing & posing ensued & I rocked the stairs with Jackee Star Jones. Who is that you may ask? Well it's a name Vadim & I have given a drag queen there. She always works the stairs & wears a black bob wig & black glasses. Before, it had been a long, curly, luxurious do. But I'm assuming that is just TOO much hair now that it's summer in the city. We get the name from Jackee who used to be on 227. We've found tons of ways to bring those characters to our life. In my building, on the first floor there is a sweet older latina lady & she just sits at the window watching everyone's business. We call her Pearl. 227 was fabulous. There ain't no place like home. I mean no place child.
So, back to Pride. After a tiring day at work, I went home to take a small disco nap. I had to prep myself for Friday night's Madonnathon at Pyramid. I had also convinced my straight roommate to come out with us. He's been bringing up the fact that he wishes he could have the gay lifestyle & has been a little jealous of my antics recently. I seem to go through phases. Either I'm incredibly virginal or I'm a raving sex-omatic. I've been calling it my Virgin/Whore Complex Tour. So for me to do my best at getting a straight man laid was going to be hard. There are tons of girls who show up to Pyramid on Friday nights so I figured he had a pretty good chance. I was doing my best until I got sidetracked by a hot piece of man on the go go box. Then it was each man for his own. I jumped on the box, ditched the shirt & started making out with him. This continued for a while until he said he had to leave. Either way, it wasn't gonna break my stride. I continued dancing & then somehow magically found myself in the arms of someone I knew for quite some time. All of us had given him the nickname Whore of Charm School. Now I was in his web. What can I say? I kissed a boy & I liked it. The taste of his cherry chap stick. It felt so wrong, it felt so right. It definitely didn't mean I was in love that night. In the midst of all that he then told me had a boyfriend & felt all kinds of bad about what he was doing so he abruptly left. Once again, my stride wasn't broken. We stayed & danced for quite a while. My straight roommate had long given up on the 2 girls he was trying to woo & by this time he had decided to leave. We ended our night with apparently one more guy asking if I would make out with him & being that I was apparently giving it out so freely I did. Then, Vadim & I left & went walking the streets of the East Village. It was there we came across this rather cute guy who stopped & talked with us. We went back to his apartment & the conversation would go kind of like this. Guy to me: Ummm you're really cute. I'd smile. Vadim would all of a sudden say Thank You! Laughter would ensue & then he'd say you have really nice skin tone. I'd smile. Vadim would again say Thank You! The night ended with Vadim leaving & me staying. You can use your imagine but I will say I didn't fully seal the deal on it.
By the next morning I felt hungover & hot. This guy had no AC & I was in need of getting the fuck out. So on my walk of shame I went. The day consisted of me doing laundry & other odds & ends & I met up with Sean so he could put some highlights in my hair. Later that night we all went to Splash & I ended up keeping my Maneater ways under control. A guy that I had had my first real date with in almost 3 yrs had meant to show up but ended up not getting in because the club was filled to capacity so they weren't letting any one else in. So we all danced the night away & then went home. Sunday was the day of the parade & I met up with everyone at different locations. I went up to Jason's work office to go to the bathroom & hang out when all of a sudden the clouds came over & a flood of rain came over the parade. It didn't seem to phase many people as they just took off their shirts & dance & run around in the parade. Scott looked like a kid in a candy store to me. It was his first parade & visions of sugar plum bottoms were all dancing in his head. I was reminded of my first pride in 2000 when I was 21 & I ended up going to to Jersey with a couple. Sigh. Oh how innocent I was then. Now it's 8 years later & I'm almost taking over the role of the Whore of Charm School. But maybe I'm being too hard on myself. Maybe it's just that virgin/whore complex I've been having. Maybe it's the fact that I have friggin tonsillitis & I'm just sure I got it from my antics of Friday night. Anyway, whatever it is it is. All in all Pride was a wonderful time. We finished the day off by going to Dallas BBQ & then hanging out some more at Jason's. The night ended with some drama that I won't get into but I did find myself back at Jordan's apartment. Unfortunately, he had received some bad news about his grandmother. A couple days ago, she passed away. I couldn't help but think about how when mine had passed & how I took the news alone. I figured no one else should have to do the same. What I found interesting was the fact that he called me. As it turns out, some times we still use each other as the go to if something go wrong. I guess when you're used to something for so long it's easy to revisit & count on it. I was just glad to be able to be there. I do know that when I got sick at the beginning of the week I did remember how easier it was when I wasn't single & I could lay in bed & someone else would make chicken soup or whatever. But that's how it is, you get the pro's & con's with everything.
As for this weekend I think I'll keep it a calm one. I'm perfectly ok with it. Yesterday my sister turned 20 & I'm once again reminded that my bday is just right around the corner. The big 3-0. Sigh. It is what it is. I'll still keep on being fabulous.
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